When the economic realities of adding another daughter to your family intersect with with the knowledge that your wife will no longer be able to supplement the household income with substitute teaching, it's time to make some budgetary adjustments. This inevitability has been on the horizon for awhile now, but until recently, I was able to repress it.
The trouble with those pesky thoughts stuck in the purgatory of your mind, however, is that they eventually remind you of why they were there in the first place. Such is the state of my current epiphany: the cable must go. I have not reached this conclusion lightly. Indeed, other scenarios have been considered. But as much as I'm tempted to disconnect the A/C unit for the summer, there aren't enough portable fans in North America to return me to the good graces of my family if I were to try something that extreme.
No, the only trauma that need be endured is the removal of the DVR band-aid and the 100+ cable channels that go with it. For everyone involved, it's best to rip it off quickly. And while I'm at it, I plan on axing the land line too. The elimination of those two expenses should give us some breathing room and allow us to use more of our resources to prepare for baby number two.
Speaking of resources, I also plan on staging a colossal garage sale in about a month. It fits in with my mood to continue purging items that at one time seemed necessary. I guess raising a family can have that effect on a person. When you begin focusing on what's essential, suddenly those material possessions you've accumulated seem expendable.
Admittedly, I've never been much of a pack rat. In fact, the only remnants that remain from my childhood are stored away in two plastic bins in the basement. One contains nothing but baseball cards, which I plan on putting in the sale. My wife, who shares a slightly more elevated affinity for collecting things than I do, probably isn't as gun-ho about all of the impending changes as I am, but she understands that they're for the best.
I can't help but be reminded of what the apostle Paul said in Phillipians 4 - "...for I have learned to be content in whatever circumstances I am in. I know how to get along with humble means, and I also know how to live in prosperity; in any and every circumstance I have learned the secret of being filled..."
That, my friends, is a tall order. While I've never considered myself to be prosperous, now is as close to the other end of the spectrum as I've ever felt. But whatever situation God has called us to, he has equipped us for. To that extent, if the first step is to pull the plug on America's favorite diversion, then so be it.
Forgive me though, if I shed a small tear for some erstwhile comrades:
Farewell, Bear Grylls. I will no longer be a part of your treacherous, if not painfully staged, adventures. Thank you for filling the void that MacGyver left over two decades ago, and for showing me that a dead seal carcass can be fashioned into a makeshift wetsuit. So long, Chumlee from Pawn Stars. Your knowledge of Nike shoes and video games is surpassed only by your cluelessness about everything else. Au revoir, almost every single Royals game, either home or away. I could only tolerate your annual futility until about mid-June anyway.
Perhaps we will meet again someday, in better times.
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